Nowadays, it is sad to see how many people treat feminism like it’s a dirty word. A movement meant to ensure equal rights and opportunities for all genders is now sidelined, misunderstood, and even feared. Somewhere along the line, the true essence of feminism got lost in translation.
Feminism isn’t about hating men or tearing anyone down—it’s about building a society that works for everyone. It’s about breaking free from the boxes that society has put us in, whether you’re a man, woman, or anything in between. But let’s be honest: conversations about feminism in Nigeria have become tense, defensive, and, at times, downright exhausting. So, let’s strip away the noise and get back to the basics.
What Feminism Stands For
Feminism, at its core, is about equality. That’s it. It’s not about proving women are better than men, nor is it about forcing men into the background. It’s about ensuring that everyone—regardless of gender—has the same opportunities, respect, and freedom to live their lives without fear or limitation.
To put it simply:
- Feminism fights for women’s rights to education, fair pay, and safety.
- It challenges harmful stereotypes that pressure men to suppress their emotions or take on roles they don’t want.
- It advocates for a world where people can just be themselves—without judgment or restriction.
The Misunderstanding of Toxic Masculinity
One of the biggest sticking points in conversations about feminism is “toxic masculinity.” Let’s clear this up:
Toxic masculinity does NOT mean “all masculinity is bad.” Masculinity itself isn’t the problem. Traits like strength, leadership, and protectiveness are wonderful and necessary. The issue is with toxic behaviours that society ties to masculinity, like:
- Men are being told they can’t cry or show vulnerability.
- Boys are being punished for being “soft” or empathetic.
- Encouraging aggression or dominance as the only way to “be a man.”
When we talk about toxic masculinity, we’re addressing these harmful ideas—not masculinity as a whole. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, this message got twisted. People started thinking feminism was attacking men, when, in reality, it’s working to free men from these limiting stereotypes too.
How Did We Get Here?
Movements like #MeToo brought much-needed attention to issues of harassment and abuse. It was a moment that empowered people, especially women, to speak up. But as with anything, there was a backlash.
Some people felt the movement went too far—labelling all men as predators or making every interaction suspect. On the other hand, some dismissed #MeToo entirely, claiming it was overblown or unnecessary. This polarization created confusion and exhaustion, making it harder for people to stay engaged with the broader goals of feminism.
But let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater. The extremists on either side don’t represent the heart of feminism. The heart of feminism is about creating a world where:
- Survivors of abuse feel safe to come forward.
- People are treated fairly, regardless of their gender.
- Harmful behaviours—whether against men or women—are called out and corrected.
Masculinity Isn’t the Enemy
We need to stop equating feminism with an attack on masculinity. Masculinity is not the problem. It never has been. The problem is the societal structures and norms that trap people—both men and women—in roles they didn’t choose.
Think about it:
- A man who wants to be a stay-at-home dad is mocked for not being “man enough.”
- A woman in a leadership position is told she’s “too bossy” or “not likeable.”
- A boy is told to “man up” when he cries, instead of being comforted.
- A man is projecting his expectations on all women.
These situations hurt everyone, not just women. Feminism is about dismantling these harmful norms and building a society where people can thrive without fear of judgment or rejection.
Feminism is for Everyone
One of the most beautiful things about feminism is its inclusivity. It’s not just a women’s movement—it’s a movement for everyone.
Feminism advocates for:
- Men’s mental health: Encouraging men to express emotions without fear of ridicule.
- Women’s rights: Fighting for equal pay, safety, and opportunities.
- Children’s future: Creating a world where kids grow up free from limiting stereotypes.
When we fight for gender equality, we’re fighting for a better world for all of us.
Why Nigeria Needs Feminism
In Nigeria, the challenges are unique but not insurmountable. Cultural norms, religious beliefs, and systemic inequalities have created an environment where feminism is often seen as a threat. But the harsh truth is, Nigeria needs feminism now more than ever.
- We see it in the gender pay gap, where women’s work is undervalued.
- We see it in the education system, where girls are forced to drop out due to early marriage or financial constraints.
- We see it in the pressure on men to be sole providers, even when they’re struggling.
Feminism addresses these issues head-on, offering solutions that benefit the entire society.
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Let’s Reclaim the Narrative
So, how do we change the conversation about feminism in Nigeria?
- Challenge Harmful Stereotypes
Speak up when you hear things like “real men don’t cry” or “women should stay in the kitchen.” These stereotypes limit everyone, and it’s up to us to push back. - Support Feminist Initiatives
Whether it’s advocating for girls’ education, promoting mental health awareness for men, or supporting policies that ensure equal pay, every action counts. - Listen and Learn
Everyone’s experience with gender is different. Take the time to listen to others’ stories and learn from their perspectives.
A Final Word
Feminism isn’t the enemy. It’s not an attack on men or a rejection of masculinity. Instead, it’s a call for fairness, justice, and equity. By challenging limiting stereotypes and oppressive systems, the movement seeks to liberate us all.
Let’s stop treating feminism like a bad thing. Let’s stop confusing toxic masculinity with all masculinity. And let’s start working together to build a world where everyone—no matter their gender—can thrive.
Wake up, Human. It’s time to move forward.
Let Chat
- Have you ever encountered misconceptions about feminism or toxic masculinity in your community? How did you respond?
- What specific stereotypes about gender do you think need to be addressed in Nigeria today?
- In what ways can men and women work together to dismantle harmful gender norms?
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